27 weeks

Evening all! I know yall are probably anxious to know how the turkeys are doing, so I'll start with yesterday's doctors appointments (that's right, with an s!).

First appointment of the day was with our regular OB. I got to do my glucose tolerance test (I passed it). We also got to see the kiddos for a quick scan with the doctor to check heart beats. Both were squirming quite a bit (apparently they like the glucose drink), so their heart rates were a tad high. The doctor answered all of our questions, as much as she could. It's all up to our MFM doctor to call the shots. We will continue to see the OB every other week for now, unless the MFM says she want more scans done.

Our afternoon appointment with the MFM was and wasn't what we were expecting. We expected to have her measure the kids again and give and update on weight gain. Turns out that'll be every two weeks (so next week). This week was all about measuring the blood flow, which still looked good for both of them. She even said that it looked like they were starting to practice breathing, which is right on target for development.

I've gotten all of my blood work back from last week now; no infections or chomosomal trisomy issues causing Elizabeth's smaller size. So we are down to just placental size or placement or she's just super small. Either way, we go back weekly for the next few weeks. If Elizabeth isn't growing enough, we will go to twice weekly monitoring (once with the MFM and later in the week with the OB). If that's not enough, hospital bed rest to monitor her much closer. The concern is that while she's better off in me for now, as the weeks go on, that could change quickly. So more just waiting and hoping.

We also had our second class for preparing for multiples. It was all about postpartum and what to expect after delivery. Got some tips on breastfeeding too. Turns out because of my PCOS there is a small chance I'll have more trouble breastfeeding (due to crazy hormone issues). I'd not heard that before, but I'm not letting it get me down. We will cross that bridge when we get there.

As for me and the turkeys, I'm really starting to feel the load. I get exhausted very quickly and my hips always hurt. Elizabeth learned a new trick; she likes to use her foot (I think based on her position in the last scan) to push out. You can see and feel her pretty good, so I know she's a strong girl. They have been very active the last few days. My hands are constantly jumping around when I rest them on my belly. Luckily they let me sleep decently in between potty breaks every few hours.

We have a few showers planned so far (and hopefully the kids don't come too early). I'm trying to finish up our registry but it's taking way longer than I thought it would. So many choices to make. I have our buy buy baby one pretty much done; just trying to transfer alot of that stuff to target and babies r us now. I left off clothing, diapers, and bottles for now because I have no clue what the babies will like; I'll take anything in small bits right now and get more of whatever works best for them.

26 weeks

It's been a busy week for us. On Saturday, we did a tour of the maternity ward of the hospital we plan to deliver at. After a long wait, we got to see the labor and delivery rooms as well as the postpartum rooms. They described how a typical delivery goes and what we can expect. It was very much geared towards singletons and not twins, but it was still nice to see and hear what to expect that day. We saw the NICU area, which we hopefully won't need.

Sunday, we went down to Fort Worth for a preparing for multiples class. I wanted to take a few classes to help prepare us for what to expect, but wasn't sure how much I'd get out of a traditional class. That's why I was so excited to see this one, geared towards twin parents. It's a two part class, so we go again next weekend too. The first class was mostly an intro to labor and delivery. We watched alot of videos on different ways to give birth and then did a few exercises to help deal with the pain of labor. Spencer and I felt the class was a little judgy toward any birth besides a natural labor. The way the video and teacher explained the epidural process and even the c-section process seemed like they were looking down on those women who use them. Maybe we read too much into it, but I felt a tad bit of shame for going straight for a c-section and not even trying attempting a vaginal delivery. I'm gonna do like I usually do and brush it off; I'll do what I want and ignore everyone else. Next week is supposed to be more about after delivery, so we shall see what that's like. I'm trying to decide whether to cancel the class on baby care basics or attend and see if there aren't a few morsels of good, new info.

And the last big baby related event this week was our second scan with the specialist to check on Elizabeth's growth. Good news is that she grew, bad news is that it wasn't as much as we wanted and she slipped into the less than 10th percentile. Owen is still measuring big; he's just over two pounds right now and measuring a week ahead. Elizabeth was one pound nine ounces and measuring a week behind. I keep telling Owen he needs to share with his sister.

The doctor has finally seen all of the structures she needs to see on Elizabeth and thinks everything looks great. Blood flow, heart, and brain structures look normal. She is just proportionally small right now. The doctor gave us some reasons why, but doesn't really know anything yet. It could be the placenta didn't attach as well attach Owen's and she doesn't get ad much nutrients. There could be an infection, which would just be good for the pediatrician to know after she's here. Could be chromosomal issues, particularly a few trisomy possibilities; she doesn't have any of the soft markers for down syndrome. Or they could just be two different people and Wolf girls run small (alot of her female Wolf relatives are on the petite side). Basically, we don't know and just have to wait. I had some blood drawn to run tests for infection and chromosomes, but neither test may be 100% accurate because they are twins. Those results should take a week or two.

The doctor has moved up the due date a week, so I will not go past 36/37 weeks now. That translates to a July 12-19th delivery. We are also now going to the specialist weekly for a scan. She said that normal bedrest wouldn't necessarily be helpful to helping Elizabeth grow, but there is a small chance I could go on hospital bed rest for the extra monitoring. She made it seem like if we came in for a scan and she saw something concerning, she'd give it one more week to see an improvement and if not I go straight to the hospital until I deliver. So hopefully if it comes to that, I'll have about a week to prepare and settle everything at home and work.

In the mean time, we see both doctors again next week. I get to do my glucose tolerance test in the morning and we get to see the twins again in the afternoon. I'm working on applying for FMLA leave at work and trying to finish up some large projects before I go out. I'm finishing up our registry and starting to get a few baby showers planned.  We are also trying to get the house cleaned up, organized, and unnecessary items thrown out/donated.  It's crazy to think we have 10-11 weeks left (at the most).

25 weeks...babymoon

Oh my! I can't believe how far we've come. Only 13 weeks to go (or less but let's hope not too many fewer). There's still so much to do and my ability to get some of these things done is quickly diminishing. So starting to get just a tad overwhelmed 

Last week, I had a library conference in San Antonio. I was a tad nervous about managing by myself down there so I brought Spencer along with me. I'm glad he was there to help drive and walk with me. For someone who barely makes her 6,000 steps each day, I walked about 12,000 steps each day down there. I wore my brace most of the time and got a bunch of sitting in during the sessions; that helped I think. But I'm still worn out even though I've been home for three days now. Spencer had a good time exploring the city while I was in meetings most of the day.  It was a nice little babymoon.

We have another scan next week to check on Elizabeth again. We are hoping for some major growth. I know they are doing ok because I feel them quite a bit now. Spencer finally got to feel both of them (Owen several times). I think the last few days they are working on their flipping skills.

Kind of blurry bump pic
from the bathroom at work
(it was this or nothing :) )

Week 24 - grow baby, grow!

We have news! The specialist was able to get us in this week. So we got to see the babies again in hi-def this time.

Owen

The appointment started with the usual vitals being taken and then the wait. Finally after what felt like forever, the sonographer came in to take lots of measurements. She was very thorough and explained alot of what she was doing. Owen was pretty cooperative. He was face up so we got a cute picture of his face. He gained about 4 ounces (I think) in the last week! He's measuring about a week ahead.

Elizabeth had moved some from last week, but not really to a better spot. She was facing my back so the sonographer couldn't get a cute picture of her during that scan. She is a little wiggle worm and didn't stay still for very long so measurements were kind of tough again. That and she's wedged herself up under my left ribcage. It also probably didn't help that I had been laying on my back for too long and needed to turn to my side; I'd gotten a tad dizzy, hot, and uncomfortable due to the babies laying on arteries. The sonographer kept going, taking measurements from a slightly more unhelpful angle. She got enough measurements to determine that Elizabeth has only gained an ounce in the last week. The sonographer finished up and gave us a disc of pics and some print outs. Then she left to get the doctor.

Elizabeth

The doctor came in and did her own scan. She was mostly looking at the babies for herself as well as taking a few measurements the sonographer hadn't been able to get. She noticed a small cyst on Owen that she's going to keep an eye on. She said they tend to disappear in utero and didn't seem to worried about it. She got better measurements on Elizabeth because the wiggle worm had moved slightly.  We got a profile pic of her this scan.  Her head is still measuring a tad small, but it's a small normal. She went from 11th percentile up to the 17th percentile. Above 10th percent is normal, so here's to hoping that her head keeps growing to catch up to the rest of her body and her brother. The brain structure the OB couldn't see was there this time. The doctor wasn't 100% satisfied with what she could see, but she was pretty confident it's all there and seems ok.  She said the growth difference could be because one placenta didn't quite stick as well as the other. But she isn't too concerned at this point. For now, we come back in 2 weeks for another scan to see how they are doing.

We are glad that both babies seem to be doing ok still, but I'm happy we get the hi-def scans every few weeks.  I guess my concern now is that the gap in their sizes will become to large and the babies will need to come early. No one has said that yet, so it's just my irrational fears. This is just a waiting game right now to see what the next step will be. To end on a positive notes, Spencer has now been able to feel Owen kick several times. Elizabeth is harder to feel so he hasn't felt her yet; I'm sure he'll feel the wiggle worm soon enough though.

Week 23 - latest doctor's appointment

Owen, waving to us or rubbing his face

Well, we made it to week 23.  We had another doctor's appointment this morning; like last month, we started with an ultrasound with before chatting with the doctor. It was great to see Owen and Elizabeth again. The tech confirmed that they are indeed a boy and girl. She spent alot of time taking measurements. Owen was quite active and shy. He waved to us, but kept a hand in front of his face so we never did get a very good image of his face. The tech used the 3D/4D special feature to try to take a picture of his face, but it just turned out kind of creepy looking because his hand distorted it. The tech moved on to Elizabeth next and took a bunch of measurements on her. Elizabeth was more chill than her brother; apparently he is sitting on her head (or really she's laying her head on his bum given their positions in my belly). She is breech and in a difficult spot to measure, which is probably why I don't feel her quite as much. Both babies are measuring well for the most part. Owen weighs 1 pound 4 oz (44th percentile); Elizabeth is 1 pound 3 oz (35th percentile); Owen is only 7% bigger than his sister. The tech mentioned that Elizabeth's head is measuring a tad small but that's common with breech babies. We got a few pictures of them and moved to another room to wait for the doctor.

Elizabeth, with Owen's bum in the right upper corner
(I think; this one is hard for me to read)

It took a while for the doctor to come in; I guess she was busy with other patients and looking over our scans before she came in to see us. She told us the babies look good. She said that Elizabeth's head measured a little small and that they had trouble seeing where the two hemispheres of the brain meet to measure the angle there. For that reason, she is referring us to a maternal - fetal medicine specialist. That's a high risk OB that has way better scanning equipment and can get better measurements. The doctor told me in our first appointment that could be a possibility, but I'd decided to wait until it was necessary instead of just jumping into seeing one. So we will see the MFM for the rest of the pregnancy for scans (I think that's what the doctor said) and our regular OB for other normal visits and delivery. So now we wait patiently for our referral to go through and put our minds at ease.

The rest of the appointment was spent answering my questions.  I got a recommendation on a support band (and ordered it this afternoon on amazon). I get to do my glucose tolerance test next month, so yay. I also get my whooping cough vaccine that visit. And anyone who wants to be around the babies need to have had their whooping cough or pertussis shot within the last 2-5 years. We decided to not worry about finding our Spencer's blood type and just go ahead with the Rh shot, which will happen around 28 weeks. I am measuring six weeks ahead, which would be 29 weeks with a singleton. We wrapped up the appointment and got another one four weeks from now. In the meantime, we will wait to see the MFM and see what they have to say.

We are trying to stay positive and trust that Elizabeth is just fine. That she's just in a bad place to measure properly. It brings some comfort to me knowing that as soon as I post this we will instantly have a few hundred prayers and positive thoughts hoping for the best outcome possible. Yall are awesome like that :) I promise to post more as soon as we know more about the situation.

Helping others and a few other random/ deep thoughts

Wednesday, someone in the Facebook support group that I'm in asked about the timing of their trigger shot with Lupron to make sure it sounded right.  There are two different trigger shots you can give yourself for IVF and they are rather different from my understanding.  I replied back telling her that I did the exact same thing with my cycle 18 months ago (has it really been that long!?).  She asked some follow up questions and I'd answer them based on what I could remember.  Turns out she uses my first doctor and sounds like she's following a very similar protocol to mine.  She messaged me yesterday to ask more questions about retrieval and what to expect.  It was kind of nice being able to help calm and inform someone going through this roller coaster of a process.  She had her retrieval this morning and now it's more of the waiting and worrying game for her.

It's moments like this that I'm glad I started this blog, even if it's mostly been friends and family following our journey and not necessarily other women going through IVF. When I learned I'd need IVF, that was my first stop- Google to find other women who'd shared their experiences.  I found a few blogs/vlogs that I enjoyed and watched them all.  I've been doing the same thing since learning we are having twins. I know every experience is different, but somehow seeing someone else make it through the process helps remind me that I've got this. I'm glad I was there to help that woman out, even though we'd never met.  I'm so happy that we went public with our journey to be able to help others.

I've been wondering what to do with my blog once the kids get here.  I'm more apprehensive to share so much of their lives with the world when I don't know who's reading.  Once they come, I'm considering using a Facebook group that I can monitor who sees each post and pictures while still keeping everyone informed.  The blog may fall to the wayside and become less frequent and a tad more guarded when it comes to personal details. I haven't decided yet. I'm torn because I know how much these types of blogs have helped me but I want to protect my children's privacy.

I've also been thinking about how my blog posts (and my sharing them on Facebook) affect others who might be in an earlier stage of their infertility journey.  Sometimes I hate clicking that share button on Facebook because I'm never sure if someone is going to see our good news and have their heart break just a little bit more. I completely understand that feeling; I experienced it often.  Many nights of walking the dog turned into my own little pity party.  I unfollowed alot of people on Facebook during our journey. I didn't unfriend them, but I wanted to control when I got to see their baby/grandbaby updates.  I think about the women out there who just want a kid and can't have one; I feel guilty every time I publish and share a post that we finally are where we were hoping to be years ago.  So I don't blame anyone who ignores my posts or unfollows me. I don't know that I'll ever know who you are, but know this. Don't give up; your dreams will come true eventually, just maybe not exactly in the way you first expected. Please reach out if you ever want to talk. I know a great Facebook support group I can refer you to as well; there are women at all stages of infertility there willing to share, help, love, celebrate, and mourn with you.

Well, that post went a slightly different direction than I'd originally intended (even though it was kind of a spur of the moment post).  Kind of a tangent post, but still something I wanted to get out there.  Thanks for listening. :)

22 weeks

Hi all!  Here's what's been happening over the last week...

We are 22 weeks today. The pregnancy app I use says the babies are the size of an American guinea pig. I can feel them wiggling around more often; it's such a weird feeling - almost like butterflies fluttering. I keep trying to tell if I can feel them from the outside so Spencer can feel too, but not yet. I've been feeling pretty good, just a bit of heartburn, back aches, leg cramps, and swelling feet to complain of (but all of it is rather mild and only occasionally). Oh and going to the bathroom all the time.  I had a full on leg cramp last Wednesday night and my calf hurt for about two or three days afterwards.  I'm thinking of getting a maternity support band thing to help relieve some of the pressure on my back, especially since I'm just gonna keep getting bigger.

We signed up for some classes with the hospital before they all fill up. We have a hospital tour later this month to learn more about the hospital's labor and delivery department. Also later this month we have an expecting multiples class that will be two days long. That one seems to go over almost everything, but if it doesn't cover breastfeeding or delivery well enough, I'll sign up for one of those specifically. We also are going to do a baby basics class, just to make sure what we think we know already is right. I'm not afraid to confess I don't know everything about babies. So I'm excited to take all of those classes to help ease some of the apprehension about what to expect later on.

Sunday night, I got a phone call from Babies r Us saying that we'd won their month drawing for a gift basket of $50 worth of things from our registry. This was quite a nice surprise! We stopped by Monday to pick it up. It had some onesies, hats, mittens, toys, and month counter sticker things all in a basket. It was really cute and cool to already have a gift for the kiddos.  I haven't really done much more work on organizing our multiple registries, so I need to get back on top of that soon.

We have a doctor's appointment next week, so that'll probably be the bulk of next week's post. In the meantime, here's a bump pic.